We’ll make a dick of you yet, doctor

We're back in the bayou! Or at least, we're back in New Orelans in 1935, where detectives Hatch and Murphy have decided to pool their resources together and therefore both are now living in the office. One morning, Hatch woke up to find a very old gentleman asleep in the doorway: Doctor James Sutcliffe. Well, if he wasn't a doctor originally, he is one now, because he can actually fix people, and he has a black bag. And introduced himself as a doctor.

What neither of the two dicks know is that he's a Grifter (they don't have Hucksters anymore) ... and whenever either of them finally manage to make a good enough Notice roll to smell anything other than tobacco smoke, they'll notice he's actually been dead for quite some time. That's right, he's Harrowed. Because that worked out so well last time!

The party of three then came across a new case - a singer didn't show up for her performance yesterday. Has an obsessed fan kidnapped her, or does it have anything to do with all the voodoo paraphernalia the party later discovered in her snazzy house?

Courtesy of Wednesday 10 April 2013's Deadlands Noir adventure at Chimera.

“I should sneak into his room at night and replace his broken foot with a cybernetic one. I think it would be doing him a great favour.”

“Don’t worry, we only bite people we’ve known for a long time.”

“The table at the back is the craziest.”
“Like we’re not?!”

“I think it would be pushing it to put ‘Heroic’ here.”

“Can you have zero in a stat?”

New player: “You guys are fighters.”
GM: “No, they’re not!”

“Can I have ‘Coward’ as well?”

“Just sayin’. Deadlands. Old people rule.”

“It’s a pity psychiatry hasn’t been invented.”

“Have you got any weapons?”
“Any what?”

“All we have to do if he DOES lose control is to walk away quickly.”

“You can be like a zombie version of Abraham Lincoln.”

“That’s what you get from not buying a gun: money.”

New player: “A tommy gun? You guys are violent.”

“I’m a dick.”
“Well, it’s good that you’re admitting it …”

Hatch: “He’s a doctor; he’s on the up ‘n’ up.”
Murphy: “Then why was he sleeping in your doorway?”

“Evil babies are evil babies.”
“They’re not evil!”

“Stop being good! You’re a Drow! You hate everything!”

Player 1: “We don’t have a pantry, because we’re not murderers.”
Player 2: “What?”
Player 3: “Or old ladies.” (P2 still didn’t get it) “It was YOUR game!”

“Well spotted, doctor. We’ll make a dick of you yet.”

GM: “A detective, a reporter and a doctor with supernatural powers and ALL fail their Smarts roll?!”

GM: “You see crucifixes and other Catholic symbols.”
Murphy: “Wait, I don’t see those?! … No, you’re right, I’m probably too used to them.”

Hatch: “We’re like carbon copies of each other.”
Murphy: “Except I’m not a Lech.”
Hatch: “Or an alcoholic.”
Murphy: “Well … I’m Irish.”

GM: “Sometimes she smells of vomit.”
Murphy: “Great. I feel so feminine.”

“With all these amulets everywhere, she’s either paranoid or someone really IS out to get her.”

Player: “We can use the milk for our coffee. It’s our party treasure.”
GM: “Now you’re getting somewhere, when the party treasure is a pint of milk.”
Player: “Do we get XP for it as well?”

Police NPC: “… Unless you were the ones ransacking the house.”
Sutcliffe: “We’re not carrying anything, are we?”
Player: “Says the guy with the milk bottle.”

“Charismatically intimidating? Christopher Walken? I thought you were talking about Hitler.”

“It’s death from above. Or at least a papercut from above.”

“He seems to be a good person to keep.”
“Or blackmail.”

Murphy: “The woman who didn’t notice flowers, even though she was a spinster. I’m keeping an eye on her!”

Hatch: “You can sleep on the couch or something. I won’t even charge you rent first night.”
GM: “Just like crack. First one’s always free.”

“Fresh meat! Fresh meat!”
“Shush, we don’t call them that. Anymore.”

And with this, we'd like to welcome our new player to the group! Judging by the quotes above, he's fitting right in ... ;)