Saturday, 21 July 2012

Exploding pizzerias - that's us!

So, we retreated to the hotel across the road and waited. A patrol bot decided to stop for pizza, so once it was inside the pizzeria, we blew it up. This set off the fire alarm in the hotel, so we had to evacuate.

Back in the lobby, where we had spent a previous few hours loitering with intent, JDog was advised he wouldn't be welcome back, even if he actually had enough money to stay there - and then some.

In a bid to get out of there, a story about how he was to smuggle a couple of star-crossed lovers (Dru and Mr G) out of the city so they could live happily ever after. Err, yeah.

Will, who was left as a look-out, got busted by the police and had to be towed after our getaway car by way of magic - he was floating up in the air. Sadly, he left his computer behind. Hopefully no one will be able to figure it out.

In the end, it was decided that we couldn't possibly get the job done in the required three days, so we phoned the client to say sorry, unless we're given a small army, it's a no go. So that's a shame - we didn't get any money ... and we didn't even get to Seattle.

Courtesy of Tuesday 17 July 2012's Shadowrun adventure at Chimera.


“Don’t you often get urges to put things on your head?”

“I’ve been providing them with dead Japanese Girls for the past four weeks. Have you not noticed?”

“I’m made of spongy calcium covered in meat. Just like you.”

GM: “I am your god!”
Player: “Says you. We’re all post-modernists here.”

“I need to see it, then.”
“No, you don’t.”

Mr G: “Can I remove the nickname Creep and give it to Will? You can give me a new one.”

Player: “The plot is somewhere down the road.”
GM: “It actually is, you know.”

“Dude, you can’t creep me out. I’m ME.”

JDog: “I don’t expect Will to do anything but giggle madly.”

“Why do you keep coming up with new nicknames?”
“Because it’s what we do. It also means we’re not like superheroes.”

“I’ve given up trying to perceive the ceiling of wrong.”

“I don’t wanna be lucky.”
“I do.”

JDog: “Plan B is I go home and watch re-runs of ‘It’s a Beautiful Life’.”

Dru: “Can plan C be blowing him up inside the pizzeria?”
Mr G: “No. Plan C is Hawaii.”

“Do you think he’s sitting there having another black-out psycho moment?”
“No, he’s just watching cat videos on YouTube. For hours.”

GM: “Every ten minutes you see something in the sky.”
Dru: “Is it a bird?”
JDog: “Is it a plane?”

Will: “I’m pretty sure someone’s watching. I’m scared. I’m really scared.”

JDog (to Will): “Listen, I’ll give you a hug later, or whatever the hell you need.”

“Looks like the drone is about to order pizza. We’re screwed.”

Dru (after blowing up the pizzeria): “I think I just covered up a murder scene.”

JDog: “I hate your ass.”
Dru: “Why? What’s wrong with my ass?”

GM: “I would’ve accepted the other roll.”
Player: “Oh bollocks.”

“I can’t believe we’ve got politics in Shadowrun.”

(to Mr G) “So basically, you’re an extremely good career worker but a really shit Shadowrunner?”

Dru: “I think I may have committed a felony.”
GM: “ ‘May’ have? I’m pretty sure blowing up buildings is illegal.”

Will: “Why is everyone on this side of New York racist?”

“Do you mean drive by or drive-by?”

GM (disappointed): “Aww but I’ve got the page open on vehicle combat and everything.”

JDog: “Is there anyone you AREN’T planning on marrying? Because I ain’t marrying a dwarf.”
Dru: “Probably you, then.”

Dru (to Mr G): “I’m beginning to see why I’d want to … marry you.”
Mr G: “Wait, I thought that was just a cover story! Did I actually propose?”

JDog: “We came for pizza, there’s no pizza. We got places to be.”

Will: “This is not how I want to end my day.”
Player: “You’ve spent most of the day screaming. Why change now?”

“Eight successes. I can drive!”

JDog: “I’m driving at 110. It’s the definition of speed.”
Will: “Race cars move faster.”

Will: “I can’t tell you where he’s gonna be.”
Mr G: “Then what fucking good are you?”

“Your fixer’s a banana. He’s obviously bent.”

“Holy crap, you guys have like a picnic!”

Well, that's it; that's the end of Shadowrun. Okay, not technically as you, dear reader, is concerned - we've got some more stuff saved for a rainy day. Next week, we're meant to create Victoriana characters, so that rainy day might be next week. We'll see. See you then!

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