Snakes on a claim!

Loot the wizard! Get all his things! Then we stuck barbs in a Blackcloak's underwear to stop him (her?) from being influenced by the thing under the hill.

We also bought a bunch of other people's claims to stop them from digging up the hill, because y'know, don't do that maybe?

The party finds some big-ass snakes kill them and bring them to Murmei for identification – a double botch later and it’s obvs clearly one of those harmless snakes that only eat small prey (and totally not sisters) and drop blood on books …

There might even be Medium Teeth

As per the previous post, we're gaming over Discord instead of meeting up twice a week around our kitchen table. On the plus side, no one has to drive home afterwards, so if we happen to get stuck in a battle, it doesn't matter so much because no one has to get up and drive for an hour (give and take) to get to work, and don't even have to change out of pyjamas.

On the negative side, the person with attention problems finds concentration even harder than usual, so this is the result of three sessions. Or, technically two, because I was so all over the place last Monday that I forgot to open the document I've been using for notes, and never even realised until the session ended. FUN TIMES. Look after your mental health y'all.

There was a table where we were sucked into some other dimension and Gunda got to speak to Tempus and was named his successor. And then there was a library and a clone of John Irenicus who was a dick, unsurprisingly. And he was alive, but somehow not, and he was trying to die properly, but because Silvanus cursed him, he kept coming back in different bodies. Something like that.

Under the Dome was a bit different to this

We got to a town currently covered in a massive dome. Our friends are inside, and we need to get inside to talk to them. Unfortunately they're also besieged by a bunch of gnolls or related monsters. There was a big artefact, which Denethor eventually crashed his precious airship-not-a-warship into, and somehow we ended up killing Gruumsh, despite siege engines being teleported just as we were about to hit them.

It was a big battle, though, so we didn't "say" much. Hence why the session after is also included.

Fun fact: Blogger has updated and is very confusing now and you can't backdate posts. Blegh. Thankfully, the option to revert back was there so I didn't have to go through the rigmarole of migrating the whole thing to WordPress.

Welcome to the minimum damage club

The bigger thing that came out we did some damage to, and then it fell through a hole in the floor along with the other creature. We battled some things and a giant tentacled brain in the middle of the goop pool, until it exploded.

Maybe we should get out of there? Dragging an unconscious Orson along with us (his player couldn't make it, unfortunately) we found a room with lights, and Jetstream picking up said lights made things rotate and all of a sudden the spaceship (yes, we were in a spaceship) decided to start a countdown for take-off. We managed to convince the system to stay put until all the terraforming bits and other things had been recalled. Which happened kind of quickly.

We found an engine room full of what appeared to be weird sex dungeon loot, and the vents in the floor turned out to be exhaust vents. As we had to scarper, we jumped down and fell out in the crater below the spaceship ... and ran for cover, because that thing was taking off!

Starring:

• Cecil, a grumpy plastic ladybird toy come to life
• Gunther von Lunar, a vampire from Unspecified European Country
• Jetstream, a regenerating speedster who does Science with bowling balls
• Mr Johnson, a seismic shapeshifter with some very good ideas ... on paper
• Orson, an unconscious hypercognitive octopoid scientist

Can we run away now?

We came across a clearing, of sorts ... It was sort of an island, but instead of water around it, there was a deep abyss and a rickety rope bridge. We carefully crossed the rickety rope bridge one by one and had a look around. Turned out it used to be a village and they all belonged to a cult, and sacrificed themselves.

We found a troll metal sacrificial knife in a sarcophagus, and decided to skedaddle before night would fall. Watching from the other side of the rickety rope bridge, there were ghosts and skeletons and it was like Halloween had come a month early. They didn't cross to our side of the bridge, though, so we got out of there.

And then we found another clearing and a hill with twenty graves on. Eight or nine of them cracked open and we just about managed to fight them off when a bloody Death Prince emerged. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...

You can't have Hugh Jackman as a familiar

We decided to go all SWAT team on the cultists. There was a mage abomination and a vindictive demon. Those things are no more, because we're pretty good fighters, actually.

Was that a racist grumble?

Having made it across the Titans, we're now heading toward more civilised areas. Civilised if you don't count the corruption abominations that attacked after someone decided to improve the soup kitchen's stew recipe with interesting berries.

Then there was an escaped Night Lady who was some sort of high priestess of an earth goddess before people decided to say down with that sort of thing, and we might now be landing ourselves right in the middle of a civil war between two religions. Because that always works out for the best of everyone ...

We parasited the parasite god

After Elani's meeting with the orcs to find out what they were doing with their troops, we found ourselves having joined forces with them. We fought with cinematic flair, superhero landings, dragons, crackling electricity on swords and everything.

Umberlee (the baddie) and her friends, including a big demon, were found inside a mountain. There was a big fight, someone might have got away, but all the rest of them were killed. The demon turned out to not be a demon, but a parasite god, and when the corpse exploded ... a lot of celestial energy was freed.

The issue was what to do with said energy. Elani took half and gave half to a follower. Gunda took half for Tempus and half for a follower, but as Tempus couldn't have that half it went to her instead. Denethor, having received a dire warning about "not taking what wasn't yours" (which he mentioned to Elani, who didn't care if it referred to this or not, but failed to pass on the message to Gunda) gave it all to his followers. So I think we ended up with four exarchs and a new Godbound or something like that. Which was nice.

The dire warning was in fact to not touch the celestial shards we knocked out of the demon/parasite god. Had we done so, we would have ended up insta-killed and perma-dead. There were bodies of gods strewn about the cave, so that's something we're going to have to get back to at a later date ... seeing as how those gods did in fact include our own preferred deities ...

An adventuring party? Here? With OUR dice rolls?

In this first proper instalment of the new adventure, we eventually managed to name our airship - The Lady Peregrin (yes, Ladyhawk was a consideration) - and take it to Myth Drannor and when out adventurising we ended up inside some kind of beast. It was okay, we killed it before it killed us. It was admittedly very close, because our dice rolls were garbage most of the night.

We made friends with Viconia, a Drow battle cleric of Kelemvor. We learned about the Silent Forge, and how it's headed by a red wizard of Thay (Elani's favourite people) who is also a lich. Yay, combo bonus!

And we finished off by getting an unsettling dream about three Orc gods who were now among the greater gods. What does this even mean???

Ranger danger!

We went further into the Xiticix territory, there was an attack. Booker tried to "save" some people. They died. On the plus side, so did the gang of baddies that were stalking us previously, so it all worked out.

We also found a camp with a nexus point. Maybe we'll attack it next week.

Gorbash went to Psyscape to chat with The Dude, but the place left him rather unimpressed ...

YOU get a girlfriend, YOU get a girlfriend, EVERYONE gets a girlfriend!

Booker and Jayson ventured into Solomon, a town with a big Aztec pyramid. They forgot to relay this information to Gorbash, who was mightily surprised when he finally joined them.

There was a group of mercs in town. Bad people. We considered using them as meat shields for a while, and then ended up by recruiting one of their Juicers. The lady in question was heavily flirting with Gorbash, so it seems now the whole party have someone to have some heterosexytimes with when we're not busy trying to save the world and whatnot.

Investigating the pyramid, because it's OBVIOUSLY a CLUE in the finding of the Key of Solomon, we found a door. Inside the pyramid was a Cyber-knight who had been missing for the past couple of years. Perhaps he knows something.

I really hope you're kill-stealing

In this riveting installment, we came across a gnome called Snails. Except he was tall for a gnome, and he could slither into very small spaces in a very uncharacteristic way. Not to mention he chopped off his own arm and grew a new one just to get away from us.

Following said gnome into the catacombs underneath Tilverton, we encountered a weird sphere of what seemed to be a bone-like material. It didn't contain a multitude of spiders (this was a genuine concern of at least one party member), but instead a massive caterpillar type thing made up of a lot of different beings. It was VERY Lovecraftian.

It died.

Later, we came across another Godbound, Batman, and a group of dire squirrels and zombies. They all died, and we learned about how dying works in this system. So that's a positive!

You do crit damage on a fumble if you crit on the damage roll

So, this is where it ends. Well, not entirely, of course, but for now.

We broke out Alistair and his Shemarrian assistant/slave from their prison, there was fighting and some of us got our heads encased in ice. Lucky for us we all had a spell on us which meant we didn't actually have to breathe, so it was more of an inconvenience than anything else.

Somehow we got out of there alive, all of us, and headed back to Magestar. But where, oh where, is our Beloved Leader of the Blackstone Juggernauts, a.k.a. John?