The Reincarnation of Axcalibur

The pregnant Eddie tried to drown his sorrows (foetus) in vodka. Strangely, he wasn't getting drunk from any of it, but instead, his body got very toned all of a sudden. He had never sported a sixpack before! Pregnancy really suits him!

We went looking for clues in Alvaston (or rather, Trevor was looking for a place to turn into a community centre), a rough part of Derby, and unfortunately, that's when Eddie decided to give birth to the big stone egg. Well, first of all, there was a thing crawling up through his throat and Tommy had to perform a tracheotomy and pull it out to stop Eddie from suffocating. The thing was a baby tentacle monster, as expected, and its gunk was highly corrosive. Luckily, Tilly performed some healing magics on him so that he wouldn't bleed to death.

Unfortunately, Eddie was carrying twins. There was also an egg and it decided to come out through his plumbing, so to speak. Ouchhh. The monster baby was dispatched and thrown into a hedge, where a tentacle monster and his tentacle monster dog then went looking.

So that was mentally scarring. We had visits from the blue-eyed German guy again, and some of us entered into bargains with him, which we're not exactly sure if it was a good idea or not yet, but we hope he isn't Fey, because then we're screwed. Eddie got another axe as replacement for his dearly departed Axcalibur.

Later on, we went back and were going to talk to the man and his dog, but the man ran into Zolistagol, Tommy and a patched-up Eddie and they didn't go easy on him. The dog, however, was behaving the way these tentacle monsters were supposed to behave ... so Tilly decided to try befriending it. How that works out, we'll find out next time.

Dr T & Mr Dre: Narcoleptic Assassins

Awesome as ever, we had taken down an assassin. Still, that wasn't enough of an adventure, so we ended up going to a coffee bar, where plot hid behind the wall. Or, rather, an opening into the sewers, which eventually took us back to the Goblin Market.

There, we met with the Labyrinth potion seller and its granny, and Jack even managed to exchange a few words with a dwarf he once didn't try haggling with. And then the naive kid - Jack, that is - invited a bunch of seelie Fae to set up shop on his lawn at Wollaton Hall. Great move, we don't think.

One that does have great moves is Alysiana, who's currently pretending not to know us. She normally does that, but now it's with an actual purpose. To find clues! Are we any closer to finding any, though? That is the question. We're too busy inventing new concepts for roleplaying villains ...

Soaking carpets in the Nottingham Chainsaw Massacre

We're back in the weird and wonderful ways of Changeling: The Dreaming again, and we left off with an Epic Cliffhanger of DOOOOOOM, in which our friend Count Valdemar was held at knifepoint in his own home. Well, it didn't exactly pan out. He got his throat cut after all, and even though Flora tried to save him, she couldn't stop the bleeding.

On the plus side, the rest of the party brought down all the bad guys, so yay for us! Jack then found some papers, while Alysiana sneaked off to administer one of the super-mega-deluxe healing potions to the princess, with Finn and Flora a couple of minutes behind. Potion administered, the princess ... well, we've yet to find out, actually.

Needless to say, Set is awesome - even chainsaws can't bring him down! Now all we have to do is to not get caught in the middle of a number of Fae nobles who want to rule Nottingham. Or get arrested for the bloodbath that is currently Count Valdemar's residence. Maybe there's an old lady somewhere we can pin it on?

Let’s not use blowing stuff up as a way to get upstairs

Still dungeon crawling our way through the Devil's Tower, we managed to make our way to the cave containing a way upstairs. Soon after that, we found the next staircase we wanted to go up ... but we also found a hidden door, and what do roleplayers to when they find a locked door? They try to break it down. Slick didn't manage it and Sam's new alien super-claw broke the locking mechanism so Mary couldn't pick the lock, so we had the brilliant idea to let Reynard blow the door off its hinges.

The roof caved in, blocking our way to the staircase. Oh, what a surprise.

So instead, we had to take the long way around (fortunately, Gunney's pace has improved - this whole Armageddon-preventing trip must be rejuvenating), being chased by an acidic, black blob that causes temporary paralysis and which doesn't even taste very good. Unlike the bug-like creatures who attacked us in our sleep, who, when cooked, taste a bit like chicken. With Slick in the party, a whole new world of culinary delights have really opened up for us. This week, he surprised us all by actually managing to make cheese and cucumber sandwiches WITHOUT people in them!

Also, there's a new word on the block: scrota, a portmanteau of "scrotum quota". Best not to ask, eh?