Can you abuse the system?

The new edition of D&D is out (sort of), and we're trying the starter set to see what it's like. The 4th edition was a bit hit and miss (mostly miss), but it seems as if they've taken the few good/useful bits of 4th and put on the useful/working 3.5 edition to make the 5th. Anyway.

I won't go into the plot, seeing as how it's the adventure in the starter pack, but it involved missing cousins, goblin ambushes, thickets and caves.

We're using the stereotypes in the box as they are (we might tweak them later when the actual book comes out), so here's the line-up:
  • Cade Tealeaf - Halfling Rogue
  • Hematite Frostbeard - Dwarf Cleric
  • Karak-Dag - Human Fighter (Folk Hero)
  • Rinn Moonbrook - Elf Wizard

Courtesy of Wednesday 30 July 2014's 5th Edition Dugeons & Dragons roleplaying session at Chimera.

Dungeons & Dragons

“What are you playing in Shadowrun?”
“I have an idea … or seven…teen.”

“How about Amethyst Chlamydia?”
“The what now?”

GM: “Could you give me the Party Death Order, please?”

“No you’re not! You weren’t going to attack anyway!”

“Hi, I’m DPS, how are you?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I have to do math now.”

“Can you abuse the system?”

“We can’t abuse it. We tried. Hard.”

Cade: “Putting three twigs in front of the cart isn’t really hiding it.”
Karak-Dag: “Sure it is! What do YOU know? You’re not trained!”

Cade: “I’m not leaving loot behind!”
Karak-Dag: “It’s not loot, it’s litter.”

Hematite: “If it wasn’t for my cousin, I’d say we head on to the town. Fuck the sidequest! No one would expect a roleplayer to do that!”

Player: “Why have you brought the dragon figurine?”
GM: “No reason.”

Cade: (gesticulates wildly to indicate danger)
Hematite: “I think he’s having a fit.”
Karak-Dag: “I think he’s trying to dance.”
Hematite: “I’ve heard bees do that to show others where the nectar is. I know he’s small and everything, but he’s not a bee.”

“Should I just put my character sheet in the box now?”
“It will save time later.”

GM: “He has an arrow sticking out of him.”
Player: “That’s very unprofessional.”

“He’s largely following his plan, except he doesn’t have loot with him.”

“At least you have double digits on your dice. I wasn’t sure you did.”

Rinn: “I Ray of Frost him.”
Player: “FREEZERAY!”

“You could always start singing songs from Frozen. It seems to be a thing.”

“When you get home, make sure to discipline your dice.”
“I’m gonna buy some new dice.”

GM: “Can you make me a Stealth check?”
Karak-Dag: “Yes, I can.”
Player: ”No, he can’t.”
Karak-Dag: (rolls a natural 20)

Right, for the next couple of sessions we'll be doing boardgames or something because various people are on holiday. There won't be a post next week because I won't have time to prepare one before I go away/come back, but we do have a rather well-stocked archive of quotes in the meantime.