Tuesday, 20 January 2015

Are you SURE you're the Chosen One?

After complaining that it's really complicated and soul crushing to generate a Rifts character, we got the show on the road. Booker managed to officially get in Ulmolf's Grudge Book (it's a book in which he notes down all the people he has grudges against ... obvs) after having a morality discussion with young Gorbash. The discussion went along the lines of "all people look the same to you, but you know that if they're wearing red headbands, they're bad and should be killed, even if they're not actually Rakshasa bandannas?"

We also went back to the Crow Bar and had Baradhi corner Granite the gargoyle in the astral plane room thingamajig again. (Yeah, he was outside around the corner, seeing as he's actually barred from the establishment.) Granite wasn't pleased. Especially not when Baradhi blew up the room again. Fortunately, we didn't care, and moved his body elsewhere. He dropped a compass and an earth elemental.

The compass looked suspiciously like the compass Booker's had in his mystery chest for some time out of game, which he (and we) conveniently had forgotten all about. Hey ho. It could be used to find the urn containing a part of Rita's soul (THAT'S RIGHT, IT'S A GODDAMN HORCRUX) and we're running out of time fast. Did we mention we only had 48 hours left, and it takes about 24 to get the astral room back up and running? Eh, woops?

Courtesy of Tuesday 13 January 2015's Rifts roleplaying session at Chimera.


“This game makes me want to not have a brain!”

“Was this game created by boring accountants who went ‘we need a spreadsheet to work out the character generation’?”
“No. If it had been, it would’ve been consistent.”

“NONE of these people are playing Rifts right now. They’re having too much fun!”

“It feel like I’m being rewarded for being last to the show.”
“Seems like it.”

Booker: “I have 100 silver bullets! I CAN hurt Gorbash! Not that I’m planning to.”

Ulmolf: “Go find me some silver and I’ll craft some for ye! – Can I do that?”

GM: “I need a page for your bullets.”

“I have a plan so cunning you could stick a tail on it and call it a weasel.”

“We’re not resorting to mass-murder? What kind of a roleplaying party IS this?!”

Booker: “I have to weigh up the costs. My pride vs the city. My pride’s currently winning.”

Ulmolf: “If I say I’m sorry, will ye come back?”
Booker: “We’re going in the same direction.”
Ulmolf: “Sod you then, you elongated bastard!”

“You’re the Chosen One.”
“Save the gunslinger, save the world.”

“Golem, gargoyle, they’re all the same, right?”

Player 1: “What do you use the fusion blocks for?”
Player 2: “They’re bombs, what do you THINK I use them for?”
GM: “Blowing up civilians.”

“There were no civilians there.”
“No, only arms and legs.”

“I deliberately didn’t take that spell. I got suspicious when the GM started suggesting I should take it.”

“I’m looking for a weapon that would make ME uncomfortable.”
“I could take my clothes off, if you want. That would make us all uncomfortable.”

“What does it do?”
“Nothing, it’s a rubber chicken.”

“Yeah, have my cast-off character concept, I dare you.”

“Wait, is he doing something I approve of? This is worrying.”

Baradhi: “Are you a schizophrenic?”
Gorbash: “No, and I hope you don’t become one.”

Ulmolf: “Maybe drinking 23 tankards of whiskey has impaired my understanding a bit. Ask me again tomorrow, but use a small voice.”

Baradhi: “You dropped a building on people just so you could get their gun.”
Booker: “It was only the corner of a building.”

Baradhi (to Gorbash): “He’s a contract killer! Why are you listening to him?”
Booker: “I’ve retired!”
Baradhi: “In what way have you retired?!”

Jayson: “In Christian terms, you’re trying to repent.”
Booker: “Yes! I’m repenting!”
Jayson: “Think of all the people you HAVEN’T killed!”

“Human society is a lot more complicated than it looks.”
“REALITY is a lot more complicated than it looks.”

“I’m just a dude in clothes until POUFF! I’m a Power Ranger.”

“I go over to the earth elemental and go ‘Aye, laddie!’ KWANGG!!”
“‘Kwang’?”
“KWANGG!! It’s the sound it makes.”

“Guns work in the astral plane, right?”
“No.”
“Shush!”

“There are parts of Stormspire you can’t go unless you’re a dragon. At least according to Fox News.”

“You think I’m bluffing? I’m a player character! We’re very unpredictable.”

“92 is probably not a low roll, is it?”

GM: “Are you planning to roll higher this time?”

Granite: “It would be gone and Rita wouldn’t be happy.”
Baradhi: “But you’d be dead, and that would make ME happy.”

“This was about as well thought out as one of YOUR plans.”
“Hey, my plans WORK!”

“There’s a certain level of self-delusion you’ve got there.”

“That’s the noise I make when I detect bullshit!”

“You were handed a step-by-step box of clues and you’ve gone and put it in your drunk vault?!”

GM: “The urn contains a remnant of the soul of Rita.”
Player: “It’s a Horcrux?!”

“It’s the white, scary place beyond the astral plane. Which you blew up. Twice.”

“Are you SURE you’re the Chosen One?”

Player 1: “Do you reckon there will be one more session after next?”
GM: “Maybe. I don’t know.”
Player 2: “You’re learning!”

Umm yeah, so there's another session (at least) to go before we move on to Hunter ...

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