Life is too short to remove safely

Finishing off the Rivergard Keep, the party came out victorious. Lo-Kag, being a noble paladin, decided to dig graves for all the slain cultists as a penance for having killed them. When Kyla and Aial tried to help (using magic instead of shovels), he got a bit upset at their blatant disregard for honour that he'd rather they not help at all.

This worked out well for the rest of the party, who went to check out the rest of the castle in case anything had been missed off. They went back to the hidden boats and found that going in one of them and rowing into the darkness meant some kind of creatures trying to capsise them.

When the creatures in question were eventually returned to death and the whole party were assembled, they rowed all the way to the main water cultist temple, because this is what roleplayers do. That's not what the adventure book thinks should be done for another couple of levels ...

Courtesy of Tuesday 30 June 2015's 5th Edition Dugeons & Dragons roleplaying session at Chimera.

Dungeons & Dragons

“I’m only following the remove safely instructions because it’s not my memory card.”
“Life is too short to remove safely.”

Player 1: “So you don’t just go blearrrghhh!!”
Player 2: “Oh, I’ll do that anyway.”
Player 3 (to P2): “And we’ll laugh at you for it. I mean … we’ll be very supportive and understanding.”

“I’m gonna do the best thing I can do when working at Boots.”
“Buy drugs?”

“If larceny was a skill in this system, I’d have it.”

“I move the future corpses into the armoury.”

“You guys can clean up the room.”
“Clean up?”
“Clean up in an Al Pacino way.”

Schnick: “When Lo-Kag charges out, I’ll take a guard in the rear.”
Player: “The gnome likes butt-sex.”
Schnick: “Who doesn’t?”

“You’re already deviating from the plan! This is round one!”

Player: “K2 leads up to K3, but there’s no K4.”
GM: “There is, but it’s called the Castle Yard.”

GM: “Do you want to target bandit one, two or three?”
Player: “Yes.”

“Falcor is the obvious choice of steed from this region. Why are you looking at other options?”

“I have a better image spell than you now.”
“I can murder people more efficiently now, oooh.”

“Brilliant. Thanks dice for betraying me.”

We've decided to have a bit of a pause from D&D while we figure out if going for the temple is the thing that should be done or not, so next week, we're looking at generating characters for Rogue Trader instead.