You're very pretty for an orc

Back in the wonderfully post-apocalyptic world of Rifts, we have encountered things like a kidnapping plot against Maria, a gang leader who might also be having a bit of handsome Cyber-knight whenever it takes either of their fancy. The plot was a way to get to us through Jayson (who would of course be obliged to rescue his damsel in distress, even though said damsel could definitely kick the bad guys where it hurts). You see, we were hiding out trying to avoid getting murderised by people who would be paid very handsomely for that deed.

Bizarrely, we didn't foil the plans, they just ... went away. The price on our heads, as it turned out, had been rescinded by Splugorth. Why Splugorth wants us alive, we aren't entirely sure about, but it's making us uneasy for sure.

We also met up with Ixchal and took a trip with the Kizzards in order to give Alistair's brother his life back. Alistair's brother is now a mute Kizzard with a human soul, and Booker discovered that Hecate has absolutely no sense of humour. You don't tell her jokingly that she should stop Jayson holding a blade to Booker's neck (a warning as he was starting to move in a very shifty way), because Hecate proceeded to lightning bolt Jayson, who, as it turned out, could smoulder not just in figurative ways but also in very literal ones.

Courtesy of Monday 11 December 2017's Rifts roleplaying session.


“We don’t talk about the coming back part. That bit makes me nervous.”

Booker: “I gave you the money for it.”
Gorbash: “No, it’s my lair now.”

“Booker’s black?!”
“He is since we watched The Dark Tower.”

Booker: “Jesus Christ, I’m in a relationship! What happened to me?! I retired too soon!”

GM: “Wunderbaum or whatever he’s called now.”
Player: “Tannhauser.”

“She’s not a merc.”
“I know! Just let her die!”

Gorbash: “…Before I kill someone!”
Booker: “STOP. BEING. ME!”

GM: “You have no idea what a charismatic and beautiful orc looks like.”

“You’re very pretty for an orc.”

“You’re already shooting them.”
“Technically, I’m grenading them first.”

Booker: “I haven’t shot someone in like a month, I’m getting angsty.”

“I would say check the index, but that’s just dangerous.”

“If there’s anything good and proper about this system, it isn’t the magic system for sure.”

GM: “You can’t just drop a grenade in the street. – Well, you CAN, Donna proved it.”

Gorbash: “She’s a dragon, she doesn’t have skills. I should know, I’m a dragon!”

“Go for the guy who uses a sword in a gunfight.”

“Ohhh, you’re upset that someone else killed more people than you again.”

Player 1: “Let’s cross that bridge when we get to it.”
Player 2: “It’s a very big bridge.”
GM: “Some people may have already crossed it.”
Player 3: “Some people might OWN the bridge, or at least be the troll ON the bridge.”

GM: “Jayson’s on the floor, smouldering.”
Jayson: “In a different way to normal!”

To be continued in the new year! Merry Yuletide and a Happy New Year!