Everyone in the countryside is nuts

The story continues!

The group is not sure why Cid would have dressed in women's clothing, but they have a search through the burning remains of their crashed airship in case of clues. They find a piece of a map and spend a long time wondering where they might be on it, despite the map being of a city in Africa and they're clearly in the Queen's own country. Suffolk, as it happens.

They find a dead parrot, which is given a proper burial rather than being eaten for dinner, and perhaps make some headway as to who they might be and what they were doing.

That's when they come across a field with a drainage problem being assessed by a quiet Irish handyman and an awkward lord who invites the party back to the house ...

Courtesy of 7 August 2012's 2nd Edition Victoriana adventure at Chimera.


“This is turning into a detective story of unknown magnitude!”

GM: “If that’s a dress for a woman, it’s a rather big woman. In fact, right about your size.”

“So. Option one: this is some kind of disguise caper. Option two is you’re a pervert. Option three is there’s an extremely large lady about.”

“You’re the most unconvincing woman I have ever seen. Although I haven’t seen many women, so that’s not exactly difficult.”

“Is it possible that I’m a stowaway, sir? If so I apologise for taking the opportunity. If I’d known you were such a pleasant woman, I wouldn’t have bothered to argue.”

Cid: “You’re quite observant, I’m gonna call you Eyes.”
Unlike: “I don’t want to be called Eyes, my name’s Unlike! - Ooh!”
Cid: “I prefer Eyes.”
Unlike: “I don’t.”
Cid: “But I don’t not like you.”
Unlike: “Give it time.”

“You’re gonna draw a map from memory while you’ve got amnesia? Good luck.”
“Lots of black dice!”

GM: “Considering it’s a map of Timbuctoo …”

GM: “It’s a lovely countryside, the weather is …”
Player: “Englishy?”

Player: “I’m gonna draw around this [map fragment] and see what I end up with.”
GM: “Yeah. Timbuctoo. Or it’s a corner of Timbuctoo and then there’s a map with a field and a crash site.”

“We weren’t on the map when the ship went down. The map is of a different country. So we’ve just wasted half an hour.”

“Hung Low is currently looking for stuff.”
“Is that what we’re calling him?”

GM: “What are you cooking?”
Player: “Apples. I’m aware apples don’t require cooking …”

“Start plucking me parrot while I’m walking back.”
“Is that a euphemism?”

“He’s had way too much experience digging graves.”

“Polly, you were an honourable crew member and friend.”
“How do you know?!”

“You really want to be haunted by the spirit of a dead parrot?”
“You sound superstitious.”
“This is a Victorian setting. Of course I am.”

“The parrot will squawk at you from beyond the nether realm! It will want a cracker from hell!”

“We are definitely down on our luck if I’M the manservant.”

“Why do we need to lie? They’re honest farm folk, and when they find out you’re dressed as a woman – ohh. Yeah.”

“I feel like I’m suddenly Baldrick.”

Cid: “Robert? No, that name’s too common, it doesn’t feel like me.”

Player: “As soon as she said ‘the lower fields’, I knew what the characters’ names were going to be.”
GM: “There’s a drainage problem.”
Player: “Yeah, there is.”

Player 1: “There’s a story here, but I can’t seem to figure it out yet.”
Player 2: “Should I give them a hint?”
GM: “If you’ve not got it this far …”

“I know there was a reason I live in the city, and it’s sewers!”

“I don’t care. Thomas Crapper right now is my favourite local hero!”

Unlike: “I don’t need a description, just pass me the shovel.”
Ted: “There’s only one shovel, that’s why I said you grab the shit and I’ll grab the shovel.”
Unlike: “How come you get … oh, ‘cause it’s your shovel.”

“What are you, Kabuki theatre?”

“Have you ever met a real woman, then?”

“He’s acting obtusely in the Victorian fashion of melodrama.”

GM: “The stable lad’s about 20, he has a bare torso, and the lord of the manor seems temporarily distracted.”
Player: “The funny thing is, considering the setting, you probably need to clarify whether it’s B-A-R-E or B-E-A-R, because there is the whole meta-human thing going on.”
GM: “He hasn’t got a top on.”

“If anyone touches my toffee apple cider on Saturday, I’m looking at you, mister!”
“Yeah, it would be me.”
“There would be penalties!”

“We’re gonna be chased out of here, aren’t we? After accidentally upsetting the lord.”


“Everyone in the countryside is nuts.”

To be continued ... at some point! Should be back to Rifts next week.