Monday, 16 November 2015

Why are we so atrocious?

We went to a town called Angels and were going to use Booker as bait. After much arguing about this point, Alistair and Ulmolf had enough and decided to go check out the town by themselves. As Gorbash and Jayson also went to have a look around, Booker decided he was going to agree to the bait plan all along. Following on from this, Booker went around various hotels checking in but not actually making use of the rooms.

Gorbash, trying to fit in, decided to make himself nicely inconspicuous ... by copying Jayson's looks, and because dragons are supernatural and therefore supernaturally beautiful, the end result (looking like Jayson's more attractive brother) did not go down very well with the Cyber-Knight, who's used to being Mr Fanservice.

Cups of tea were had. Stalkings were done. In the end, Booker got a message from a six-year-old girl to please help by rescuing her mum in a warehouse. Booker, being the nice chap that he is, decided to use her as a meat shield.

The child's mother wasn't in the warehouse, of course, but a necromancer was, so he bravely ran away.

Courtesy of Monday 9 November 2015's Rifts roleplaying session at Chimera.


“This is my best friend Nxla. He’s a tower block. A tentacled, murdering tower block.”

“You keep driving people away.”
“Tuesdays and Wednesdays have never been fuller.”
“Because we left!”

Rifts is like if GURPS wanted to hurt people.”

“Are you going to lick him when he gets here?”
“No. That would offend him.”
“So you’re doing it, then.”

“I stopped eating because cake arrived.”

Player: “Can a dragon become a vampire?”
GM: “I will not answer that question.”

Gorbash: “I’m not supernaturally good-looking … I moisturise.”

“You have all the Rifts books in the world and you still have to invent stuff? This is a bad sign.”

GM: “Rifts – the only game where the players scare the game master.”

“What do the people look like?”
“How would we know, we’ve never seen them!”

“I know the guy disappeared here, but why are we so atrocious?”

Player: “We could use you …”
GM: “As the bait. Sorry, the GM didn’t say that.”

“That’s like saying ‘I’ve got some nice bait here for the fish’ and then not use the bait.”

Ulmolf: “Are you SURE you’re an assassin of high quality? Because right now you couldn’t assassinate your way out of a paper bag.”
Player 1: “To be fair, the bag could be MDC.”
Player 2: “And out to get him.”

Player: “Are you wanting a new character?”
GM: “He can’t, he’s supposed to save the world.”

“You can tell we’re not on the right track by the way the GM’s having to make up NPCs.”

“Can I cast some spells on you? I’m really good at it. I’d like to cast spells ALL OVER you.”

“You’re spooning Irn-Bru? Something’s wrong with you.”

“I’m not a nice person. I’ll ignore her but feel bad about it later.”
“And what’s your character doing?”

Booker (to a child): “Stop crying.”
GM: “Yeah, that’ll work.”

“I’m a nice guy, BUT …”
“You’re using a six-year-old as a body shield!”

To be continued!

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