Monday, 22 February 2016

Apparently I have the Force

Everyone mourns the passing of their friends in different ways. Nole by searching Rhan's - or Sarge as everyone tends to call him these days - quarters to see if he happened to leave any orphaned guns laying around (sadly not), and suggested to Kon that humans tend to like flower arrangements when someone's died. Kon subsequently turned Sarge's whole room into a flowering jungle, just like they do on Naboo, because that's what she found on space internet.

The party made plans for doing the delivery of space meth to Voras the Hutt, but there was a slight problem ... namely the arrival of a couple of star destroyers and some other assorted Empire craft in the planet's orbit. We needed to get off-planet in order to get in touch with the other Rebels, but we needed to drop the crate of Glitterstim off while we were at it. Finding out we had to do business with Voras the Hutt, our contact was not pleased. Something about a relative being held as a slave. New side quest: revenge-kill the Hutt.

Meanwhile, in a valley a few miles away, Sarge wasn't dead. He was told he could use the Force, and a Jedi ghost told him where to find his lightsaber and robes and to hopefully not freeze to death on his way out of there. He didn't. He found an old spacecraft and flew back to base. After being welcomed back to the land of the living, he got his combat knife back ("Here, I ... kept it safe for you" - Nole), and had the touching jungle tribute slightly rearranged so he could actually use his bed.

We learned that a Captain Yolarin of an Empire Dreadnought wanted to defect along with his entire crew, so that's another thing to look forward to once we manage to get off the planet. And that we did. The Rebel message was sent, and the crate of drugs was delivered ... after a bit of shooting, because two crews showed up to take it to the Hutt. In the end, it was insisted that the Hutt's translator/spokesperson come in person to fetch it to avoid further altercations.

After the session we found out what the Doc had to say to the GM and NG in private: that if Kon and Nole were trying to steal the ship when Doc and Sarge were away, NG was to kill them. Just because one's got a bounty on his head and the other one's a Twi'lek doesn't mean they're going to go all Mutiny on the Bounty. Sheesh!

Courtesy of Monday 15 February 2016's Fantasy Flight Star Wars roleplaying session at Chimera.

Star Wars Roleplaying Game

“I didn’t fire anything last session. Except Nole as my bodyguard.”

GM: “Apart from to those optimistic in the group, Sarge is missing, presumed dead.”

GM: “Chances of being alive are pretty slim.”
Player: “See, there IS a chance!”

GM: “What are you two doing?”
Player: “Don’t group me with him!”
GM: “Okay, what are YOU doing?”
Player: “I’m glad you asked!”

“Nice robe. You should take it off more often.”

“Surely you’ve heard of Luke Skywalker?”
“You’ve seen the selfies. It was a long flight.”

Rhan: “You want Doc.”
NPC: “He is not like you.”
Player (to Doc): “Your Midi-chlorians aren’t through the roof.”
Doc: “No, but my saltwater taffy is!”

“The handle might be cold.”
“YOU DON’T SAY!”

“Now you’ve got your own Jedi starter kit and Halloween costume. The Force is strong with you if you’re wearing it.”
“That’s a metaphor for someone’s penis.”

“I don’t want to die in a stairwell.”
“That would be a really noble death right now.”

Rhan: “I’m gonna fly into a canyon wall.” (rolls poorly) “Yes, I am.”

Rhan: “Apparently I have the Force.”
Player: “Did Doc just take a selfie with him?”

Rhan: “He said I’d walk the path alone, but would occasionally hear his voice in my head.”
Rest of party: (looking extremely sceptical)

GM: “You can’t turn an astromech droid into a portable sensor unit.”
NG: “Challenge accepted.”

Rhan: “You could re-seed a planet with this stuff! I’ve got nowhere to sleep!”

“Take all available ships in this area!”
“But sir, that’s us.”

Nole: “I can show you my gun collection. Don’t touch!”
Tam: “Is that a euphemism?”
Doc: “No.”

Doc: “Why do you want to learn how to use a computer? Just get NG to look it up for you.”
Nole: “Yeah, but I can’t get NG to look up porn for me.”
Doc: “Why not? He can do anything you want if you tell him to.”
Player: “… That sounded very wrong.”

“This guy is not a credit to your species.”
“Or ANY species.”

NG: “I cover the floor with rubber.”
Nole: “If it’s a giant slug creature, shouldn’t it be salt?”
Kon: “This is why we must never let Nole do anything diplomacy-related.”

GM: “I can’t think of a Disadvantage, so fuck it.”

Kon: “I don’t have Intimidation.”
Nole (immediately): “I know what you can do instead!”
Player: “Well, it would be a STUNNING attack!”

Antillos: “You guys sure know how to live.”
Doc: “It’s better than knowing how to die.”

“You take the 16 000 on the left, I take one, you take the other 999.”

“A Twi’lek with underworld knowledge? Unheard of.”

“Nole is conflicted about Kon.”
“Because she’s a woman, but she doesn’t like him?”
“No. Because she has tits … but they’re red.”

The session ended with us all aboard the Dreadnought, where we hopefully won't die.

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