On the plus side we now have an Imperial Dreadnought on our side. Problem is it's short-staffed by about 600 people, so we went on a recruitment drive.
Ran into a bit of an issue when a ship came along demanding we hand over Konvoru because reasons. In turn, we called in a favour from some friends ... and a frigate ship showed up, hastily dismantling the intruder ship. For some reason we got a pretty clear run after that ...
Oh, and we also learned a bit too much about Nole's sexual preferences. Yeah, let's not talk about that.
Courtesy of Monday 22 February 2016's Fantasy Flight Star Wars roleplaying session at Chimera.
“I started having a bit of a cold on Friday, and it’s turned into—”
“Full-blown AIDS?”
“The reason he wants to learn how to use the StellarNet is so he can find porn on his own and doesn’t have to keep asking NG to do it.”
“So THAT’S why NG is so disillusioned! Having to look up Nole’s porn every day!”
“Twice on Sundays.”
“This is where we find out he likes purple tits.”
“Yeah. Purple, blue, green – fine. But red? That’s just weird.”
Player 1: “Or it’s a trap!”
Player 2: “No, Doc has to say it’s a trap.”
Doc: “I’ve already used the word ‘magnitude’.”
“My meta-game senses are tingling.”
Player 1: “If we go to Bespin, can we meet Lando Calrissian?”
GM: “No, he’s not there currently. The number of black people in this sector has gone down dramatically.”
Player 2: “From one to zero?”
Sarge: “I’ll be in your bunk.”
Kon: “It will be a hot day on Hoth before that happens.”
“I need three months, a team of 72 and the processing power of a minor planet.”
“You have one week, Geoffrey, and a cup of coffee. And the coffee is cold.”
Kon: “The guns can’t be mounted on the ship.”
GM: “The guns can be mounted, though.”
Nole’s player: “Yeah, that’s the bit Nole heard.”
“No prejudices, but ...”
“Is that like ‘I’m not racist, but’?”
“Maybe their colour depends on if they’ve had acid or alkaline food?”
“Are you insinuating Twi’leks are litmus paper?”
GM: “The guns are HUGE. MASSIVE.”
Nole’s player: “He’ll caress the guns a little and then mutter something about being in his bunk.”
“He doesn’t need Viagra, but he can only have sex in an armoury.”
“But then he can go for days!”
“And just before he comes, he shouts ‘rapid fire’!”
“It’s a game, we don’t care.”
“THIS is a game!”
Kon’s player: “Kon might have listened in on the conversation, but I didn’t.”
“Nole’s not listening in on the conversation, he’s busy making Jackson Pollock paintings.”
“This is a comedic joke, not an actual, serious plan!”
Player 1: “Do you wake up with a cold sweat or a woody? That’s how far to the Dark Side you’ve got.”
Player 2: “Both. A woody with a cold sweat.”
Player 3: “On the hottest part of the body?”
Player 2: “Is that ... condomsation?”
Player: “I succeeded.”
GM: “But?”
Player: “I might have rolled three Disadvantages.”
GM: “Hahahahaa, I’m quite mad.”
NPC: “Talos has a message: You owe him one.”
Kon: “Do I put more points into Obligation now?”
Player: “Actually ...”
GM: “Please don’t tell me you’ve changed your mind again.”
GM: “You go with Ant and the engineer I haven’t named yet.”
Player: “Declan!”
“Sorry, I thought you were gazing lovingly at me.”
“Kon wasn’t, I was.”
“I’ll win both Kon’s and your heart! Eventually.”
“The doctor was just about to revive the heart attack guy, so he shot him in the head.”
“NG would be proud.”
GM: “What did you say the engineer’s name was?”
Player: “Declan. Because you said we were leaving with Ant. – Oh, NOW you get it.”
GM: “Declan comes to find you because I refuse to call him Dec.”
“We don’t need you. You can stay on the Dreadnought, and he’s amenable!”
“Roleplaying characters – sometimes they take you places you don’t want to go.”
To be continued!
