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An adventure triple bypass operation

Super investigators Hatch and Malone kept investigating this session, and in doing so, ended up skipping from part one to part five of the multi-part adventure. Because that's just how we roll.

Perhaps the shady guy who owed the Mob money was trying to get hold of some missing barrels from Hellstromme Industries ...

We ended up going into the Bayou with an inbred Captain Ahab, looking for a ginormous alligator. We found the alligator. It was now a ginormous zombie alligator, hidden in an old train cart. We spent so much time trying to get the door open ... when we could've just walked to the back, where there was no door - although we would've been eaten a lot quicker that way.

Courtesy of Wednesday 30 January 2013's Deadlands Noir adventure at Chimera.


“M&M is not just a game, it’s a lifestyle choice!”

“D’you reckon Yoko ever played Uno?”

“This is my serious face.”
“I recognise the voice.”

GM: “There’s a couple of ways you don’t die.”
Player: “That’s reassuring.”

“You’re creating your own NPC meat shield in the form of a small child? That’s sick.”
“Even for a roleplayer.”

“Whatever he said, don’t pay attention to him.”

“A guy who was trying to find out about zombies, man? - I have gone South African. A bit TOO far south.”

“I said they had blank expressions, not that they look like the living dead!”

Malone: “Could they be Bible verses?”
GM: “You spend half an hour decoding the numbers as Bible verses and find gibberish.”
Hatch: “I was about to be genuinely shocked and impressed.”

“It’s now the date of Emma’s murder.”
“He shouldn’t have hired us.”

“We’ve made some tremendous progress!”
“Oh yeah? Like what?”
“...She’s missing, alright!”

“We’re shifty as fuck!”

NPC: “When will you have her back?”
Malone: “By 9pm tonight … but it might roll over to tomorrow.”
NPC: “If you have her back by tonight, I’ll pay you for tomorrow as well.”
Malone: “Tonight it is.”

“We can pretend to be Jewish.”
“Yeah, because THAT will go well, considering the time period.”

“I wanted to say something about the right to bear arms.”
“Yeah, but not in banks.”

NPC: “Are you sure you don’t want to open a bank account? They’re free.”
Malone: “Oooh.”

“If banks lent money to people like me, loan sharks would be out of business.”

“A new kind of organised crime called banking.”

GM: “You know when I said you’re doing part one of a multi-part adventure? You’re not starting part six.”

Player (to GM): “You gave us clues! The WRONG clues!”

“See? I told you I was a dick!”
“And I’m annoying!”
“No, we’re a pair of dicks.”

“We’re a couple of hobos! With hats!”

“So it’s taken us an hour to get there?”
“She’s gonna DIE.”

“And these were my GOOD shoes! Okay, I only have one pair of shoes, but they’re pretty good!”

“This is beginning to feel like Cthulhu.”

“I think they’ve just had a party wipe.”
“Let’s see if we can do it in tandem.”

Hatch: “I boot the door in!”
GM: “It’s a freight car. It slides open.”

“It’s a good thing we’re high level characters with lots of experience, or we’d have NO chance!”

“Can alligators become harrowed?”
“Only if they practice unholy showtunes.”

“The boat is now my armour.”

“Who could have known alcohol could be so useful?”

“If he opens me up, that’ll be the end of him.”

“Note to self: Buy bigger gun.”

Having survived zombie alligator, we still had to get Emma back from the Mob before they kill her ...