Also, Sam decided to work on his latest invention and left steering of the steam wagon train to Gunney and Reynard, which was ... interesting. Well, it was speedy, if nothing else. The two ladies of the party exchanged knitting patterns, because that's what women do, right? (They more likely compared guns and ammo, to be fair, but shhh!) Slick, when not trying to feed Sam people, spent most of the time in his wagon trying to stop all his bottles falling off shelves whenever we had to brake. And swallowed a Manitou in the process. Oops. May we live in interesting times.
Courtesy of Tuesday 11 October 2011's 1st Edition Deadlands adventure at Chimera. Apologies for the delay in posting.
“I can see a hole, so there must be a plot.”
“Not as far as we’re concerned.”
“When I was young, I used to work in the bread mines.”
“Is that where you got your yeast infection?”
“When did YOU get an accent?!”
Slick: “Should I brew Greek Fire or Healing Ungent?”
Reynard: “You’re asking ME? Greek Fire!!”
Slick: “…Of course.”
“What do you mean, I have no answers?”
“Exactly.”
Player 1: “You’re counting gassing an authority figure as the worst thing I’ve ever done?”
Player 2: “That I know of.”
Player 3: “He fed dead people to Gunney!”
Player 2: “Oh yeah, and CANNIBALISM!”
GM: “As the jar comes toward you, you feel really attracted to it.”
Player: “Screw Match.com – just catch things off of shelves!”
“I’m having one on the basis that he won’t want any more after this. Oooh! It’s like toothpaste!”
“I call it train cars – it’s actually two wagons.”
“They’re tragons!”
“In a minute, I’m expecting the cast of Sex and the City to walk past.”
“You can only be 11 more pages worth of funny.”
“We’ve delayed so long that the Apocalypse has probably already been and gone.”
“I’m a good cook, just that my ingredients are somewhat out there.”
“Or someONE out there.”
“What we need is a motorway services.”
“Gunney’s eyesight is so bad I can’t even find the dice needed to make the Cognition check.”
“Grab stuff, we’re breaking again!”
“Basically, we’re doing that scene from Mary Poppins over and over again.”
“But with better accents.”
“Dude, you’ve heard my Southern accent.”
“It’s still better than Dick van Dyke!”
“The GM turned a page!”
“We’ve found an encounter!!”
“Oh dear, we’re about to lose a party member. Or two.”
“Armed of course with Fightin’: Scissors.”
Mary: “We don’t have two weeks for Gunney to get there on foot.”
GM: “Was that in character?”
Mary: “No.”
GM: “It should have been.”
Gunney: “I took it as such.”
GM: “We say you said it in character.”
GM: “What are you doing with Jackie?”
Mary: “Exchanging knitting patterns.”
“In the world pre-Facebook, you could get away with a lot more.”
“I believe we’ve now entered that sick zone …”
Slick: “How does it compare with future food?”
Jackie: “It’s not irradiated. That’s always a plus.”
Slick: “Does that mean it’s heated?”
Slick: “I don’t think I could kill anyone with my cooking.”
GM: “Yes, you could!”
“I’ve killed us aaaall!”
“Do any of the ladies look like they’re gonna buy anything?”
“It’s gonna be like watching the shopping channel for four hours straight, isn’t it?”
“Have you figured out who’s gonna shoot you yet? That’s right, it’s BOTH of them!”
“So what you’re saying is you come from a family of black magicians?”
“No, they weren’t Creole.”
Jackie: “How come you are still alive, and why am I relying on you all?”
GM: “What are you doing in front?”
Reynard: “Looking absolutely terrified.”
Gunney: “And possibly peeing.”
Reynard: “We haven’t made up our minds yet.”
“I thought you were going to say I wake up as Linda Hamilton in Terminator.”
“Aww, I was waiting to do that joke!”
“We hit 88 mph and fly straight into the future, away from the plot.”
“I’ll sleep outside.”
“But the whiskey’s in here.”
“I’ll take the whiskey with me.”
“GM doesn’t have a plot for when we get to Devil’s Tower. He’s relying on us killing each other before we get there.”
Sam: “It was a part of my lung for 30 years, I’m keeping an eye on it, and anything funny – I shoot it.”
Player: “That’s a monologue that doesn’t work in many media. Cthulhu? Yes.”
(Puts a figure from Talisman on the board)
GM: “That’s what the Sioux looks like.”
Player (looks at figure): “Like a monk?”
Sioux: “Aren’t you dead?”
Gunney: “That’s what they tell me.”
“Switch to Sioux: That man is not with me.”
“You bring out the mad in Mad Science.”
“Eating each other works quite well out here – you just roll ‘em in the salt.”
“Son of a bitch, I knitted Kevlar again!”
Gunney: “I have one Dead Man’s Bullet left and one fool keeps waking me up. Coincidence?”
Sam (to Slick): “Stop feeding me people!”
Sam (to Slick): “When this gun is finished, first bullet is heading your way!”
“Can I spend more in Drivin’: Steam wagon? I’m learning.”
“Look at the GM’s face. Is that a look you want to remove?”
“Yes! I’m a GM too, I KNOW that look!”
“How is faster a safer speed?”
“We’re essentially the Top Gear part of the team.”
“And I’m James May! Get over it!”
“At the speed we’re going, we’ll be Mythbusters by the end.”
Slick (after inhaling a Manitou): “Well, that can’t be good for me.”
Slick (about the inhaled Manitou): “I’d like to think we’ve developed some sort of rapport and he won’t do anything heinous.”
“I think being possessed is just a bit worse than dysentery.”
“It’s like The Muppet Movie with carnage.”
“It really is.”
So what happens when the resident Alchemist has swallowed Sam's ol' blacklung? We're a bit
